Forgiveness

[Emma Jones]

Why did Jesus ask us to forgive 70 times 7. Why do we need to forgive? Some people do horrendously evil things and as one tries to reason it out, forgiving doesn't always seem right. For example, if you forgive someone, it may allow the perpetrator to think they got away with their wrong doing. It may make you look weak. It may make you vulnerable to attack. 

When the man came to take Jesus to death, Peter tried to defend Jesus by cutting off his ear. When Jesus traveled with his disciples, and they were mocked by townspeople, the disciples wanted to call down fire from heaven on them. Jesus told them not to do that, and for their suggestion, they 'know not what spirit [they] are of'. 

If there is one thing we cannot control in life, we cannot control whether or not other people love us. The problem with retaliating when someone hurts you, is you are trying to force them to treat you the way you want to be treated. You are trying to force them to love you. Love can never be forced. 

When Jesus taught the golden rule, do unto others as ye would have others do unto you, it wasn't just because He wants us to be nice. It's because as we have mercy for others, God is convinced to show His mercy to us. So when we treat others the way we would like to be treated, we open up the opportunity for God to bring blessings into our lives. 

When someone endures abuse, God will help the person or people leave that abusive environment. When you leave, do not look back. Don't ever go back to an abuser. Jesus died so we can live. Living requires us to set up boundaries that our enemies can not cross. Society should join hands in making sure innocent people are treated fairly. Society should set up systems of judges so that people who perpetrate evil on others are detained within boundary limits in order to protect the innocent. Society needs to protect the innocent and treat their own members the way they would like to be treated which includes protection. But this process of protecting the innocent does not mean that people are licensed to hurt others who choose not to have loving behavior. 

Society can limit them, for example, they can put boundaries as to where criminals are allowed to live. But society should not abuse or torture people for their wrongs. Once society does this, they begin to take God's role. Only God can change a person. Only God can heal someone's heart. We cannot force someone's heart to chance. We cannot force someone who wants to be evil to be good for fear of what punishment society will enact. Because that creates a world where people are not choosing to be good out of their free will and out of love, it means people are choosing to be good out of fear. This creates loosh energy and is not helpful for humanity. Those who are restricted to live within certain bounds because of their sins, should be ministered unto by ministers who can nurture them and give them the opportunity to heal from their pains and traumas that are behind their evil behaviors. 

We cannot force others to love us. We cannot force others to behave the way we want. We can use the power of society to limit the boundaries of people who behave this way. But this is for the protection of the innocent, not for the punishment of the guilty. The moment we leave the attitude of forgiveness and move toward vindication, we are usurping people's will. This is a very negative way of treating people. Even if someone has chosen to do harm, this does not make it right to return harm upon them out of a spirit of vengeance. 

One thing we can do when someone harms us, is we can learn about human nature. The more education we have about human nature the better we can protect ourselves. Instead of being victims, we can become protectors. The best way to take down someone who is evil is to outsmart them. In order to do this, you can't give up. You can't become a victim. You have to keep trying to win by living right. You can show them it is better to live right than to do it the wrong way. 

You can offer forgiveness and redemption for what the 'bad guys' have done. For those who begin to feel remorse for the wrong they have done, you can help them know that it's ok if they did wrong in the past, because they don't have to be that kind of person anymore. They can change and repent. They can experience the blessings of redemption. And when someone is redeemed from the desire to do evil, by being treated with love and respect; evil finds its permanent end.

[NHA]

At root, this is the issue of justice versus mercy.  For a public offense, meting out justice is usually the right way to handle it.  Sometimes, mercy is better.  Knowing which to apply requires great wisdom.

There are two objectives when dealing with criminals:  protect the public against further incursions, and reform the criminal.  The former should end when the latter is achieved, but it is very difficult to know when someone has truly reformed, as it is easy to fake.

Ideally, we would sequester criminals, or otherwise prevent them from repeating their abuses against society.  This is why, in the past, people were often cast out of the group or city, they were ostracized, as punishment.  Today, that is impractical, and so we have prisons.  People like to say we lock criminals so they can't repeat, but that only works for the duration of their sentence.  In reality, it serves to deter people from crime, same as fines.  People talk about a "debt to society," which is really just punishment, and has nothing to do with prevention or reformation.

In A Clockwork Orange, criminals were programmed in an experimental program to prevent them from committing future crimes, but that didn't work out so well.  Castration for sex offenders is a similar example of disabling future crimes of that genre.  Ultimately, any measure to protect the public is going to involve reducing the freedoms of the criminal.  This is why prevention measures should cease when reform is achieved.

An individual can, and should, forgive.  This is probably not true for society.  Forgiving does not absolve the criminal of guilt.  It is when the victim stops being upset by the bad actions of the guilty party, when he stops being angry and resentful. It is when he realizes that the perpetrator needs help, not scorn.

[NHA]

Here's the view from the other side.  If you're the one who needs forgiving, you need to apologize.  Here's what a sincere apology needs.